Why Do I Want to Share My Writing?

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I have been told that I write well even when I was young.  I was "paid" 20 sen (20 Malaysian cents) when I was nine.  A bunch of mothers were learning to read and write in "class dewasa" (adult class).  One "kiasu" (ultra competitive) lady asked her son who was the best writer in class.  That was me. I wrote her a story and she gave me 20 sen.


When I was studying in an Australian university, I was soundly scolded by my psychology professor.  I turned in my assignment three weeks late.  The school had a system where 10% was taken off your marks for every week you were late.  I was a huge procrastinator in those days (probably still am).  Anyhow, I was given seven out of ten.  I thought, well, it wasn't too bad.  Then I was called into the office.  The professor was livid! He surprised the heck out of me.  He accused me of being irresponsible, lacking gratitude for the gift I was given.  Huh? My assignment was  well written, my synthesis was mature,.....and on and on.  I should value my ability to write well and put it to good use and yada ...yada... He left me red faced and ashamed.  Still did not take away my procrastination though !


I don't know if I still write well.  For all I know, inflammation has gotten to my brain! I don't know what damage more than 30 years of autoimmune issues have done.  No one has reviewed my writing for the past 17 years because I have been keeping myself quiet at home.  But here I am, challenged by Brene Brown to show up! Watch this video, which I think summarises her work beautifully.  

https://youtu.be/IiDkJ_twYbE


She calls herself a storyteller and a researcher.  She is a very popular author and Ted Talk speaker.  Shame Resilience Theory, developed by Dr. Brené Brown, involves connecting with our authentic selves and fostering meaningful relationships with others. Moving away from shame requires a move toward empathy.  “Owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing we’ll ever do.”


I want to be a tiny beacon of hope to those who have been ill, those who feel small, those who feel they are not enough.  I want to encourage the ordinary folks out there to develop self compassion and acceptance.  In our very "ordinariness" there is courage to find joy in the moments of our lives

Comments

  1. Lilian10 October 2021 at 05:07

    You are very definitely not alone with all this otherwise Brene Brown would not have been able to develop a theory!! But I do think it is just putting a new spin on what has been out there: insecurity: resistance: inferiority complex: the mask; impostor syndrome, etc. Yes, we feel vulnerable because others use our vulnerability as a weapon against us- both socially and corporately. The healing and strength has to come from within so that there are no weapons.
    And I think that is what you are saying by wanting to accept yourself and embrace your ‘monster’. Age and wisdom are factors whether you are home or out amongst others. Interesting how we are taught to embrace our weaknesses and negate our strengths. And when we are told something about ourselves, we don’t want to believe it! I watch how my kids teach their kids empathy. It is heartwarming. But the kids are also made to feel good about themselves! Different generation? Maybe all along we have taught and modelled the right thing without being aware.
    And you do still write well as you share your thoughts.

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